Helping Daughters Heal from Maternal Narcissism

Welcome to The Healing Daughter

The Healing Daughter, founded by Ruth, is dedicated to helping women who have been raised by narcissistic mothers. We offer a safe, supportive community and a structured, trauma-informed 5-step healing process that helps daughters break free from the deep emotional wounds caused by their upbringing.

 

If you’ve spent years feeling defective, struggling to gain your mother’s approval, or hiding from the world in shame—you’re not alone. I know these feelings all too well because I’ve lived through them myself.

 

Now, I’m here to guide you on a path toward healing, reclaiming your self-worth, and discovering your authentic identity.

My Journey: From Feeling Defective to Becoming Whole

Before I began my healing journey, I struggled with many of the same challenges you might be facing today:

  • I felt like I needed to be fixed: For years, I buried myself in self-help books and therapy, believing I was the problem—that if I could just be “better,” my mother would accept me. But no matter what I did, I couldn’t move forward. Only when I uncovered the real source of my pain—the mother wound—did I finally start to heal.

  • I was consumed by shame: I didn’t have opinions of my own, I was afraid to speak, and I constantly felt that people were judging me or laughing behind my back. I lived with an overwhelming fear of being exposed as a fraud.

  • I altered myself to please my mother: Every time I visited her, I would starve myself to avoid her harsh criticisms. I thought being “skinny enough” might earn her approval, but nothing I did was ever enough. Her criticism kept me trapped.

  • I feared I would mess up my children: As a mother myself, I was terrified that I would pass on the same toxic patterns, fearing I wasn’t good enough and would fail my own kids.

Through my own healing process, I discovered that it’s not about fixing yourself to meet others’ expectations—especially your mother’s. It’s about recognizing and healing the emotional wounds caused by maternal narcissism. The Healing Daughter offers a comprehensive, step-by-step approach to guide you through this process:

5 Step Roadmap to Healing the Narcissistic Mother Wound:

01.

Nervous System Mastery

We’re aiming to balance those triggers, ease anxiety, and equip you with tools for a steadier emotional ship. By the end of this step, you’ll have self-regulation skills and a clearer understanding of what sets you off emotionally.

02.

Decoding Maternal Narcissism

This is where we dive into understanding your mother’s actions and the impact of her narcissism. It’s about gaining insights that will pave the way for your healing journey. By the end of this step, you’ll have a solid grasp on how your mother’s behavior has shaped you.

03.

Embracing Grief

This step is about letting go of the pain and loss you’ve carried due to your mother’s narcissism. We’re aiming for a detachment from that enmeshment and a space for your own identity to flourish. By the end of this step, you’ll find yourself more in tune with your emotions and better equipped to handle them.

04.

Fostering Independence

Here, we’re rebuilding your beliefs and reworking those ingrained patterns that have been holding you back. It’s about finding your own voice and reclaiming your independence. By the end of this step, you’ll be standing stronger in your beliefs and stepping into a more empowered version of yourself.

05.

Cultivating Inner Nurturing

In this final step, it’s all about nurturing yourself. We’re focusing on self-care, boundaries, and defining your relationship with your mother on your own terms. By the end of this step, you’ll have embraced your personal power and carved out a future that truly resonates with you.

How can I aid in your healing?

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Choose Your Path to Healing

We understand that healing is not a “one-size-fits-all” journey. That’s why we offer several options to suit your needs:

 

The Healing Daughters Society ($97/month)

    • Access to a private, supportive community
    • Exclusive video lessons and exercises
    • Monthly Healing sessions
    • Access to workshops on boundary-setting, reclaiming your identity, and more!

      $97/month

This is the perfect option if you’re ready to heal but prefer a community-focused environment.

The Healing Daughters 5 Week Intensive ($2,500)

  • Weekly group coaching sessions
  • One 45-minute personalized one-on-one coaching session.
  • A personalized healing roadmap
  • Access to all group program materials
  • Personalized check-ins and ongoing support

For those seeking both community and individual guidance, this hybrid option offers the best of both worlds.

The Healing Daughters One to One Coaching ($2,000/month – 3 month commitment)

  • Weekly private coaching sessions with Ruth
  • A tailored healing plan based on your unique story
  • Unlimited email and voice note support
  • Priority access to all resources, workshops, and materials

If you’re ready for deep, transformational work with Ruth’s undivided attention, this program is for you.

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YouTube Channel

Head over to YouTube for free in-depth videos to get you started on your healing journey.

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Blog & Resources

A variety of free resources and articles that I write to help daughters heal from narcissistic mothers.

Happy Clients

The Healing Daughter is an amazing community to be a part of! Don’t take my word for it, check out what others are saying!

I had been no contact with my mother for over a year before joining THDP, but I was still experiencing shame, fear, and isolation in my everyday life. Problem solving and self regulating when my mother would attempt contact was particularly difficult. I have been in therapy for a few years which has been incredibly helpful overall for my mental health, but I felt what was missing in my life was a community who shares similar family background and struggles. Before joining THDP and working with Ruth, I still frequently questioned my reality and felt like my friends wouldn’t truly understand so I had nowhere to share authentically. Recognizing how the patterns of abuse and triggers from my family repeat themselves in my life and hold me back was really powerful. I recently gained the courage to decide to leave a toxic job to start my own business doing what I love. I never would have had the self awareness and courage to even consider that option before THDP. Now I am confident with setting boundaries and tapping in to my needs instead of acting out of obligation to others. Ruth and the group of daughters in THDP are some of the most compassionate and supportive people I have ever met. We vent, problem solve together, dive deep into learning about and healing our trauma, do somatic work and self soothing exercises, and even share our wins so that we can celebrate each other. It feels like a group of daughters walking alongside you on your journey rather than preaching about where you should get to. I am so grateful for this community. I know that the journey of healing never truly ends, but I actually feel like I’m in control now and I love having the support system to lift me up when I need it.
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Anonymous per client's wishes
First of all, thank you the work you do for The Healing Daughter community. Stumbling on your page was a divine appointment. Thank you for everything we see you do and for the things you do behind the scenes for this community. Your page and this community has been a vital part in my healing journey. I’ve never felt so seen, validated and heard. The amount of support, kindness, gentleness and love in this community is overwhelming. It’s been an honor to hear others share their stories as I share mine for the first time. Your content and the daughter’s stories have modeled how to set boundaries and made me brave enough to stand in my truth and believe in myself. The Healing Daughter Community is such a safe place to ask questions, vent, connect with other daughters and encourage one another. It’s what my heart needed in this season. Beyond grateful 💜
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Pam
My main problem was my relationship with my mother and the effects it was having on all areas of my life. I was struggling with low self-esteem, poor boundaries, and bouts of painful depression and anxiety. I found I still used alcohol to alleviate difficult feelings, and hadn’t completely mastered how to self-soothe and regulate. I’ve tried everything from talking therapy, 12 step groups, CBT, and holistic therapy. Although this all helped me with greater self-awareness, it really didn’t address my relationship with my mum. I found I kept returning to self-destructive patterns, and really struggling to keep boundaries in place because I hadn’t addressed this core wound. My biggest aha moment was when I started to see who my mum actually is rather than who I want her to be. I also started to realise that the only person who can advocate for me is me and the only person who can advocate for my healing is me. It’s really sunk in that I’m the one who is responsible for my healing and no-one else and as a result, I’ve find I’ve been able to transform the relationship I have with myself! I think the first part is really getting to understand how your nervous system has been impacted by chronic stress caused by hyper vigilance from your childhood as well as unprocessed trauma. And then beginning to really understand what you childhood actually was like, and what your relationship was like when you were a child into young adult. Having the group is a huge eye opener because you can validate and support each other, when we have been taught to second guess ourselves constantly. This work has really changed something in me at the core. I really have started to understand where some habits and patterns come from, but most importantly I’ve felt like I been able to transform the relationship I have with myself. The most important relationship of all!
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C.O.
Biggest challenge: Regulation understanding the body and the impact of the mother wound, felt scared, and frozen. After joining The Healing Daughters Society - Feel much more supported in my journey. I don’t feel alone like I have my whole life. Ruth truly helps and cares about helping others on their healing journey. I’m more aware of my nervous system state, I know how to regulate. I have the tools. I feel safer being me and in my body. I truly feel like I can heal. I’ve seen much improvement already. Join you won’t regret it. All information and practices are there to help you fully heal.
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Sabrina
Biggest challenge: Individuation & Setting Boundaries, Feeling: heavily enmeshed, trapped, true self buried never to be exposed & fully realized in this lifetime. The Healing Daughters Society helped me to become my own person. It validated my feelings and showed me that there was much more to life than being trapped under my mother's spell. I have learned how to set boundaries, safely & effectively. I have so much more confidence In who I am & what my needs are now. I have been taught that my feelings are valid and I am worthy of healthy relationships. THDS was a crucial part in my journey to self soothing, emotional regulation, and nervous system regulation. I have learned so much in this course & the group community, I am forever grateful. And I'm only halfway through! This is an investment in yourself. Your future self. And you commitment to help heal your past self. Ruth is like a big sister sharing so much of her knowledge and personal experience to help walk you through every step of the way. You will not regret it! I am so incredibly grateful to Ruth & THDS. Her course has been an absolutely life changing for me, and I am so looking forward to continuing on this journey to healing.
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Maggie
Biggest challenge:Dealing with guilt and people pleasing Feeling: Like I had to always do what others wanted me to do and guilty if I disappointed people and then resentment/entrapment to not have my own opinions respected. After joining THDS I feel empowered like I have choices now to explore what I want. I’m learning to attune to my needs and heal my nervous system which was always on high alert. I’m able to reflect on what I’m actually feeling and then take steps to mother myself and take care of my needs. Don’t hesitate! You won’t regret taking this leap to grow personally and leave the past behind.Ruth is a genuine person who cares about her clients. Having a group who you can share your background with, who you can relate to and support each other is invaluable.
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Anonymous per client's wishes
My anxiety was my biggest challenge to overcome. Feeling like I was all over the place with my thoughts and emotions. I did not have awareness of my body and self.It made me feel really stressed.I have a better control of my emotions and my anxiety. I accepted the place I am in and continue to push myself to grow more and be my best self. I enjoy the present and prepare for more improvement.Understanding how to manage my triggers and understand the root of my trauma has been an awakening experience. I have a better understanding of myself and my needs. I have started to realize how to love myself and how to give myself grace. I’m being more confident just by getting to know myself and following healthy habits.Please do it. Not only is Ruth so supportive but she really has a gift. She will be understanding and know exactly what to say and how to help you.I love this program and support system. It has really helped me on my journey. I finally feel like I’m on my way out of survival mode.
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Rosaly
Biggest challenge: Just not understanding my mother and her complete lack of a desire to have a relationship. Feeling: Unworthy. Finally finding the answers and the research Ruth collected and put together answered so many questions & there was no shame or belittling in the learning aspect of maternal narcissism. Very inclusive and loving group. Realizing I am not the problem & my mom had a disease . Narcissism is very serious and coming to terms with the fact that she will. Dive in !!!! Ruth’s classes are phenomenal a balm for your broken heart. Such a great group & class & so healing to know I was never alone in that type of abuse & that their is a way out.
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Alanna
Biggest challenge: confusion. Feeling: Lost and stuck in a cycle. I feel little by little I have started to gain clarity of my life. Clarity about how and why my life is how it is Clarity about things that were not right about the way I was raised Clarity about why I do and react the way I do How emotions affect my physical body. To give yourself the gift of joining at least for 1 month .... nada que perder y mucho que ganar!Este programa a darme la claridad y el apoyo que necesitaba!
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Anonymous per client's wishes
Biggest challenge: I never had anyone in my life to believe yes I have childhood trauma because of my narcissistic mother and because of no external validation it was so difficult to believe myself. I couldn't trust myself and I felt like I was making excuse to avoid my day to day life because everyone invalidated me. A door with belief got opened with hope that I was not crazy. So far I'm yet to complete step 1. Learning about nervous system helped me to be self aware and a community of non judgemental was so helpful in sharing and getting validation. A must join if they have childhood trauma because of narcissistic mother as I can see how it is helping me I want to Thank from my deep heart for this community. Felt like I found this community when I had no hope.
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Anonymous per client's wishes
Biggest challenge: Talking about narcissism. Not feeling seen because no one seemed to understand what im going through. Not feeling supported. Unseen, unheard, alone. I feel a sense of belonging and support. There are others going through what im going through and I am not alone. Ruth is amazing makes you feel so supported and heard and seen she is always there replies when you message. I feel a sense of safety after joining heal daughters society. Please do join. It is important to be part of healing daughters society to enhance your healing journey and make you feel supported.
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Anonymous per client's wishes
Biggest challenge: Shame, insecurity and regulating triggers. It made me feel weak and less than. The nervous system lessons have helped with regulating myself for sure. It’s made me more aware and in control. I think taking a deep breath and focusing on how to get yourself regulated and the awareness of that is very important. Well I’m only part way in but so far I’d say it’s definitely worth it.
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Shawnessy
Biggest challenge: Working through the mess of emotions I felt from dealing with my NM. It made me feel like I was a bad daughter. But it also made me feel like I was crazy for trying to protect myself and live my life being my authentic self. I feel less alone. I understand more my emotions feelings, nervous system, why my mom acts the way she does. That this information is valuable and it works when put into practice. I would say it is 1000% worth the investment. It helps you feel like you can work through what is going on inside emotionally and also physically. Knowing where and why these feelings come from is important-In turn so you can handle things better and HEAL!!!
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Holly
The "I Am Worthy" coaching class is truly amazing. Ruth created a safe space for me to learn, process, and start healing from what I now recognize as childhood narcissistic and emotional abuse. In this course I've connected with other women with similar stories and struggles. The validation and community support became the safe space I needed to dig deeper and start reflecting on my true emotions and baggage. Ruth will give you the knowledge, tools, and support you need as you work through recognition, acceptance, self-protecting boundaries, and healing. After MANY years of reading books, seeing therapists, and trying to desperately understand my mother's dysfunction and continued emotional hold on me; it is this course that put me on a road to organized and gently accountable healing. I'm rising above the unhealthy relationships my childhood created and ensuring I break this cycle for my own children. It's truly a gift I'm giving myself and future generations. THANK YOU RUTH!
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MP!
When I signed up, I wasn't sure what I was looking for-- I just knew that what I was experiencing with my mom/grandma was not normal or healthy for me, and I felt I deserved to be treated better. I had been in therapy for years working through the trauma that l've experienced, and now that I'm in a better space therapy is a safe place for me to go, and I wanted to work on me so that I could stop minimizing myself and advocate for myself. In the month of coaching that I've had, l've set hard boundaries that have allowed me to feel less anxious, and more free to be present, and become a healthier version of myself. I was nervous and just sad when I started, and now I feel more confident in my choices towards my mother and feel more affirmed/seen within our group. Just thank you for providing this community... went years feeling isolated in my experience and feel so valid with my feelings knowing that others can relate. I have a new found opportunity for community paving opportunities to create positive relationships with other women.
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Latasha